1st September 2011

Ok so the last few days have been terrible. I have binged and binged and i hate myself for it.
I have the major period pains at the moment and all I want to do is curl up in a ball and sleep, but becuase I can't do that - I have to work - I eat to keep myself going.

But its now the 1st September. I have 23 days. I want to be toned enough to wear this bikini and I currently am just as fat and flabbly as I was over a month ago.
What happened to this month..why have I slipped so much.

Today has been good so far, I could have been better with breakfast but I should be able to stay within my goals anyway.
So Far:
Breakfast:
Slim fast bar: 210kcal
Banana: 100kcal
Cup of tea with 50ml skimmed milk: 18kcal

Lunch:
Tesco Fruit pot: 147kcal.
Can Diet Coke: 1kcal

Plan for rest of day:
Snacks:
Slim fast snack bar: 95kcal
Snack a Jacks: 89kcal

Dinner:
Homemade mince and Jacket potato: 359kcal

Total: 1019kcal.

I have another fruit pack for tomorrow so that should be fine. I plan to have less for breakfast - No Banana to start with - I am going to try and get back to my fruit and yoghurt for breakfast, which combined with the fruit at lunch will be very good calorie wise meaning I can eat a little more freely in the evening stopping D worrying and if anyone asks - like E & G in their worrying it will all sound good.
Going to get back on the P90X tonight if my stomach pains let up...hopefully my energy levels will start to go up so I can then get up earlier to do the P90X in the morning.
I actually have a day off on Sunday (doesn't happen very often) so I am hoping to go to the gym then swimming as well as doing the P90X. But we shall see.
As long as I do the P90X everyday from now I will be happy.
I Will Get Back To Thin...

Edit:
So I ended up being dragged to the pub after work but I was good when offered a large glass of wine I said no I will have a diet coke :) Which was awesome!
However - I text D asking him to sort dinner of planned jacket potato and mince...he cooked up 2 pizzas...
So I ended up eating the whole pizza he gave me - I felt horrid after.
Then I had already said I would go to the beer festival with friends so went down for one - was good I only had a half a pint of a cider.
But my calories ended up at over 1700 in the end :( and I didn't get a chance to do any exercise...I am crap...